[$139] / [£96.90]
Ever wanted to spy on your neighbours at night from the comfort of your own bush? Of course you have, and now with the Snooperscope perving on strangers is easier than ever. The Snooperscope is a portable wireless gadget that uses your smartphone or tablet as a screen and the infrared light as a source to enable you to see in low light and total darkness. Suitable for iPhone, iPad, Android smartphones and tablets, you could use this to watch animals if you wanted, but most of you will probably use it for dogging.

[$19.99] / [£5.99]
Is your phone on fire right now? How do you know for sure? Is there smoke? Are there flames? You've no idea have you, you hapless fool. Thankfully, this Thermal Sensitive iPhone Case is capable of alerting you to the presence of heat on your phone while simultaneously protecting it. You could even throw your phone into the sun and it would still survive, probably.

[$199]
Have you ever wanted to see in the dark? Are there things you get up to at night that would look more amazing if you could see them through thermal imaging? Then why the hell haven’t you bought one of these yet? The Seek Thermal Camera enables you to adapt your smartphone (see site for compatibility) to see infrared light in darkness or the daytime. You could eat a billion carrots and not come close to being able to see this level of light detail. The website suggests possible uses as detecting a clogged pipe, tracking dog’s footprints and finding someone in a barn. Come off it, I’d use it for the following: Watching someone wee in a pool. Writing profanities with hot water. Seeing if farts show up. Checking if my coffee is cool enough to drink. How warm is my groin after a cat sat on it. There are tonnes of uses for this gadget, 99% of them hilarious.