[$9.49] / [£5.99]
In order of preference for things that could be abusive, mine in descending order would be stepfather, relationship, graffiti-tattooed-on-my-face, and balloons at the top. Because these Abusive Balloons are exactly how I feel every time I go to some crap party. Whether it’s a birthday, christening or wake, undermine the emotional impact of the occasion with these sassy and rude balloons, which are almost as offensive as your stench-ridden breath which you’ll use to fill them. They come in packs of 4 red, yellow and orange balloons which read “Fuck Me You’re Old, Happy Fucking Whatever, and This Party Is Shit”. I’d like to add my own suggestion “Everyone Here Will Eventually Die”.