Pet Couch Enchanted Home Pet Ultra Plush Club Chair
[$99.99] / [£79.99]
Cats can sleep anywhere, the lazy little bastards. Dogs however require a certain amount of comfort and majestic surroundings in which to slumber and dream about chasing things that don’t exist. This Enchanted Home Pet Ultra Plush Club Chair has a name that just rolls off your tongue doesn’t it? What’s wrong with calling it a Dog Sofa? A Chez-Hound. Whos-A-Lay-Z-Boy? I should be in the dog furniture naming industry, if it exists. This finely crafted masterpiece of canine comfort contains a completely made-up feature called the SnOOzZzONE Pet Comfort System. I’m not making this up, google it. Whoever writes these titles was clearly drunk on power and dog-love. It has a storage area for toys and bones, removable covers that you can wash the dog stink out of, and elevated draft free sleeping. Because your dog is going to give a shit about that when it drapes itself over a hunk of warm, drool encrusted foam after it chews the crap out of this thing. Still, it looks funny. Ha, tiny dog sofa.

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Pet Couch Enchanted Home Pet Ultra Plush Club Chair
Pet Couch Enchanted Home Pet Ultra Plush Club Chair
Pet Couch Enchanted Home Pet Ultra Plush Club Chair
Pet Couch

Gigs 2 Go Flash Drive Pack
[$69.95]
If you’re like me you always need a USB drive for something. I share photos of erotic hedge trimmings with friends down at the pub, but whether you’re a creative, a business jerk or just a hoarder of files, these tear-away Gigs 2 Go flash drives are a handy solution to all your storage needs. Coming in 1GB and 8GB, these drives are made from recycled paper pulp and plastic, just like Kim Kardashian’s buttocks. But unlike Kim Kardashian’s buttocks these drives are virtually indestructible (time have mercy on that butt), their memory chip is waterproof, shockproof and doesn’t even need a cap for protection. They come in packs of four and are the perfect way to share your work, your spreadsheets or perhaps reams of insulting limericks with a co-worker in a quick and easy way.

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Gigs 2 Go Flash Drive Pack
Gigs 2 Go Flash Drive Pack
Gigs 2 Go Flash Drive Pack
Gigs 2 Go Flash Drive Pack

75 Years of Marvel Book
[$115.81] / [£87.75]
This compendium of Marvel’s most celebrated characters is a must for any comic book fan. If you’re tired of all these rebooted cinematic incarnations of your favourite heroes, where the only difference is this new actor has a better haircut and the villain is a metaphor for feminist cat food or whatever, then this 75 Years of Marvel book should wash away those Hollywood versions and restore the childhood imagination you once had, before TV molested your brain. The XL format of this book comes with over 700 pages of images including vintage comic books, original art and behind the scenes stills. Satisfy your inner geek by grabbing a copy of Marvel’s magnum opus and take a gander at how the likes of Spider-Man, Hulk, Captain America and Batman have changed over the years. By the way, I erroneously included Batman in there on purpose, just to annoy every single comic book fan ever. I like to incur rage in strangers.

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75 Years of Marvel Book
75 Years of Marvel Book
75 Years of Marvel Book
75 Years of Marvel Book
75 Years of Marvel Book

Billetus Carbon Fibre Wallet
[$45]
Are you annoyed about your huge bulging wallet ruining your silhouette when you pose in tight hotpants or shorts? I know I am. I could earn less money and I could wear clothes that weren’t so tight on my sweet cheeks, but that’s just not going to happen. Instead I’ll just buy the Billetus Carbon Fibre Wallet, a super compact stylish wallet made from aircraft grade aluminium. Coming in at 8.5mm thick for the minimus and 9.5mm for a maximus, they are the same thickness as an iPhone 4s, or seventy four wasps squashed into the shape of an iPhone 4s. There are various pricings available on the Billetus Kickstarter page for both the minimus, which holds five cards plus cash, and the maximus, which holds seven plus cash. It also boasts it will keep your business cards in pristine condition, so you can hand out contact details for your erotic animal boutique to strangers without them being all crinkly and junk. Order now to receive yours just after xmas, making it the perfect gift for people you don’t love enough to get them a present on time

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Billetus Carbon Fibre Wallet
Billetus Carbon Fibre Wallet
Billetus Carbon Fibre Wallet
Billetus Carbon Fibre Wallet
Billetus Carbon Fibre Wallet

Cholera Fixed Blade Knife
[$189.99]
Hey fellow marketing guys, so we’ve got this awesome new knife out, It’s an all mountain blade designed by adventure photographer William Egbert Jr who spent 15 years coming up with it. It can whittle wood, butcher animals and probably cut through the centre of the earth if you drop it. What shall we call it? Hmm, I dunno. Let’s name it after a disease. Why? Because diseases are sexy. Oh yeah I forgot! Let’s call it cancer. No everyone has that. Ebola? That’s on trend but it’ll pass. Cholera? I love it! It’s timeless and makes you think of ruggedness like the dirty water in which Cholera spreads easily. So here you are, the Cholera Fixed Blade. A 3/ 16 inch carbon steel blade. Now go cut some shit with it Mr outdoorsy guy.

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Cholera Fixed Blade Knife
Cholera Fixed Blade

Bobine Charging Cable
[$9.95] / [£22.99]
We are at a moment in earth’s history where there are only three major problems facing humanity. War, famine, and phone batteries. The sight of a phone that’s been plugged in all night having only charged two percent is worse than seeing a thousand starving children or the dismembered limbs of a shrapnel riddled freedom fighter. The usual suspect when this inhuman tragedy occurs is of course a knackered cable; whether you use an iPhone, Samsung or a cup on the end of some string, a frayed and battered charging wire will always been the bane of your existence. Well with the hardwearing Bobine cable you’ll have no more charging woes, no longer will you have to contort your wire into shapes the Karma Sutra thinks are ridiculous just to get a bit of charge. This 24 inch cable works with Android and iPhone phones, and flexes into any shape without damage whilst coming with two dash mountable clips for in car charging fun. The thing even stands on end like an enchanted snake with your phone precariously balanced on top of it. I guarantee one day someone chains several of these together to make a mile high one.

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£ Check it out

Bobine Charging Cable
Bobine Charging Cable
Bobine Charging Cable
Bobine Charging Cable

The Argonaut Four-Season Boot
[$88]
Have you ever wanted a pair of shoes you could use to mess up daffodils, stamp on crabs at the beach, boot a hibernating squirrel over a wall or kick a snowman square in the groin? Then grab a pair of the Argonaut Four Season Boots, made from a mixture of Kevlar-Cotton, Eva-Rubber, Tyvek and Microfiber, words which sound extremely fancy and tough to me. The earlier you order a pair of these from the UT Labs Kickstarter then the cheaper they are for you. They’re also extremely light weighing in at less than 420g. That’s no more than a gazelle’s head, which you could kick clean off no problem with these durable all-weather boots.

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The Argonaut Four-Season Boot
The Argonaut Four-Season Boot
The Argonaut Four-Season Boot
The Argonaut Four-Season Boot
The Argonaut Four-Season Boot

Laughing Buddha Ice Mold
[$9.99]
I’m pretty sure Buddhists don’t drink, but if they did they’d definitely cool their booze down with a tiny ice version of their lord and saviour Buddha. Buddha is clearly the party god, not all uptight like regular God, Allah and The Flying Spaghetti Monster (he has anger issues). These Laughing Buddha Ice Moulds are made of silicone and create four tiny versions of everyone’s favourite fat deity, and measures two and a half inches tall. You don’t have to just make ice though, you can also use it to create moulds of chocolate, candles or frozen yoghurt. Who wouldn’t want to lick a frozen Buddha all day long?

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Laughing Buddha Ice Mold
Laughing Buddha Ice Mold

Swatch SISTEM51
[$175] / [£110]
What did people do before phones to tell them the time? Why, they used watches of course. Before that? They’d look at the position of the sun using a sundial. Swatch have failed to release a range of limited edition high-end sundials for the discerning timekeeper, but they have released the highly anticipated Swatch SISTEM51. With its 90 hour power reserve and hermetically sealed case, the 3Hz movement delivers accurate timekeeping even in molten lava. What? Oh. Apparently that bits a lie, but it is a really nice watch. Look, you don’t care what junk is on the inside do you, you care that it looks fancy and tells the time. Just like people it comes in shades of black, white, orange and red, and apparently won’t need servicing for the entirety of its lifetime. They said that about Robocop though, look what happened to him. MURPHYYYYYY!!!!

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Swatch SISTEM51
Swatch SISTEM51
Swatch SISTEM51
Swatch SISTEM51
Swatch SISTEM51

The Frankie from Rubber Killer
[from $96] / [from £55]
Men, women and children, we all have too much crap to carry around these days. Whether it's twelve copies of grazia, a drum full of rhino medication or a massive sudoku puzzle carved into a corpse, you've got your hands full if you don't have a handy place to store all this guff. Introducing the Frankie Weekday Tote Bag, a spacious and durable accessory made from thick 14oz cotton and hardcore reclaimed rubber, making it literally as tough as old boots. Whose boots? I don't know, some dead guy? Anyway, the Nylon handles make carrying a load of weight rather comfy, like a fat chap having a nice sit down. It comes in burnt orange, mustard and black, which is eerie as that's what I had for tea last night, and is lovingly put together in Chiang Mai, Thailand by fairly paid employees. No Apple-style suicide factories for us! Only the finest products made by shiny happy people are for sale on our site!

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The Frankie from Rubber Killer
The Frankie from Rubber Killer
The Frankie from Rubber Killer
The Frankie from Rubber Killer



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