[$9.95]
Some people call them cookies, others call them biscuits. What we all agree on is that circular discs of chocolatey crumbly goodness taste even better when dunked in milk, coffee or tea. Unfortunately the United Nations recently declared losing half your cookie in a drink as a war crime, but thankfully the Dunking Buddy is here to help. Using a revolutionary technology described as “magnets or some shit”, this device can be attached to the cup included or any standard household cup to ensure you never lose a single morsel of cookie. It’s also proudly made in the USA, for any of you snackfood racists out there.

[$18.98] / [£10.95]
Ever wanted to glass a stranger in the face but not really? Well now you can with these Unbreakable Silicone Pint Glasses. Laugh in someone’s stupid face as you ram this bendy booze holder into their frightened maw. Made out of the kind of high-quality silicone you’d previously only find inside a stripper’s tits, these glasses can be stored in your pocket, frozen, rewashed, set on fire, pushed into a wombat, used to store urine, and so much more. They’re available in transparent white or opaque red. If you want any other colors, tough shit.

[$35.89] / [£34.99]
Whether you’re in the late stages of Parkinson’s Disease or you’re just a stupid clumsy shit, these Mighty Pint Glasses will prevent you spilling a single drop of precious precious booze ever again. The Mighty Pint Glasses are made out of plastic and contain Smartgrip Technology, which is something we may see installed in sex robots of the future someday. Smartgrip Tech enables these glasses to grip to any flat surface when knocked from the side, but without preventing you from picking them up. Because that would be stupid. And cruel. And stupid.

[$35.99]
Alcohol should always be drunk from the correct vessel, otherwise you look like a dick. Whiskey should be from a simple glass tumbler, champagne from a flute, tequila from a shot glass, and Coors from a tramp’s shoe found under a bridge. If you’re enjoying a Moscow Mule however, you simply must drink them from these delightful Mini Moscow Mule Shot Glasses. They’re made from copper, which helps to keep your drink cold and your appearance hipstery. Only one of those things is useful, but the deliciousness of an ice cold mule more than makes up for anything else.

[$22.95] / [£19.99]
Despite looking like something birthed after a bong fucked a teapot, the Porron Drinks Decanter is actually a rather elegant piece of glassware which is quite popular in the Catalan region of Spain. So there. Made from recycled glass and capable of storing 1litre of wine, Kool-Aid or urine, the point of a Porron is to allow drinkers to gulp straight from the decanter without getting each other’s gross mouth germs all over the rim. And nobody likes getting germs on the rim, do they?

[$23] / [£16.99]
From the author of Bathing in Wine, Shaving with Milk and Dancing in Pepsi comes this astounding new book - Cooking With Beer. This essential collection of beer-based bites contains 75 spectacular recipes using a range of beers including instructions for beer sandwiches, beer tacos, beer cakes, beer frittatas and probably some kind of beer beer. I don’t know, I haven't read it, all I know is I wholeheartedly approve of new ways to get myself drunk.

[$89.97]
As summer approaches the last thing you want to drink is a massive hot mug of steaming coffee, because that'll make you sweat all the water out of your god damn body. But if you're still hankering for an injection of caffeine you could drink a glass of coke like a non-idiot, or you could use the My Dutch Cold Coffee Brew Maker to create a delicious glass of cold brew coffee. Using an innovative clean cold water drip method the My Dutch extracts new flavours from coffee which you wouldn't get from hot brewing, and comes in both 350ml and 550ml varieties, so there.

[$39.99]
Oak-aged alcohol is often rather expensive, and if you're too cheap to buy it then your only way of achieving that smoky booze aftertaste is to enter a burning building while downing a pint. But fortunately for you smoke aficionados there's now a solution, and it comes in the form of this Oak Bottle Mini Master Infuser. Capable of infusing 355ml of booze with an oaky taste in as little as two hours, this vessel made from 100% American Oak promises to improve bourbon, rum, beer, BBQ sauce and any other liquids you fancy by adding an ultra quick burst of charred oak flavour and aroma. And yes, I suppose you could try it with urine.

[$24.98]
What are your favourite smells? Wet dog. New car. Post Coital Disappointment? Well that's a shame, because Cool Material don't make craft candles that smell of any of those things (yet). But they do make ones that smell of Coffee and Cigarettes, Tobacco Humidor, Barber Shop and Public Library. So if you've ever wanted your home to stink of Nescafe, smokes, hair and old lady urine you're in for a ruddy treat you are. Since they're 16 ounces each these candles will last for approximately "a period of time" and they're made from soy wax, so if you're vegan you can eat them, if you want. I'm honestly not bothered mate. Do what you want with them.

[$19.95]
Do you want to get trashed in your living room but you're sick of using your hands to hold beer like a sucker? Then the